I don’t know the exact dates for many of these, as most of them were scanned in for his website in one fell swoop.
January 6th
chat logs excerpt
| themaneatingcoat (3:58:30 AM): | go make things |
| Rachael Noel (3:58:28 AM): | I’m not making things. |
| themaneatingcoat (3:58:38 AM): | like fan drawings |
| Rachael Noel (3:58:32 AM): | I’m cleaning. |
| Rachael Noel (3:58:40 AM): | But yes… that’s a good idea. Fan drawings. |
[ full chat here ]
That chat inspired this drawing I’d given to Stefan, kept for years in his lock box.
signed: “Your Biggest Fan (hah hah), Rachael”
February 14th
The following chat inspired chipmunks.
chat logs
excerpt
[06:23] themaneatingcoat: you were sleepin so heavy,i ran my fingers through your hair to try and wke you up nice …but you let out a chipmunk noise and did’nt wake
[06:23] : HA HA HA.
[06:23] : a chipmunk noise?
[06:23] themaneatingcoat: some sorta tiny mammal noise
[06:24] : wow….
[06:24] : I must have been dead.
[06:28] themaneatingcoat: I think I wanna make a “StickyFriends” cartoon………something really rudimentary and weird…….very simple renderings of me and you in odd situations…….very little movement but good audio……i have a look n my head of what we should look like.
[06:28] themaneatingcoat: i’ll sketch some stuff out and show you
[06:29] : ok!
[06:29] : Will we be… lanky stickfigurey limed?
[06:29] : limbed?
[06:30] themaneatingcoat: well…..not neccessarily……the drawing will be good….er…sorta……you will be know from your hat(the one from MOTP) and I will be have my superman hair flip.
[06:31] : ok.
[06:31] : excellent.
[06:32] themaneatingcoat: I think laying over the audio and making the sounds very impressive will be awesome.
[06:32] themaneatingcoat: it will make less drawing do more work….ya’know
[06:32] : indeeeeed.
[06:32] : Good idea.
[06:34] themaneatingcoat: mabye on Friday…..we can start working it out.
[06:35] : Yessssss…
[06:35] : Friday. God knows I’ll be here.
[06:35] : eeesh.
[06:35] themaneatingcoat: I’d like to keep the story/ies simple…..like,we go to a lemonade stand and buy lemonade.
[06:36] : can’t it be simple, but surreal?
[06:36] : like…
[06:36] themaneatingcoat: that’s the idea
[06:36] : we go for a ride on the back of a giant flying squirrel?
[06:36] : or…
[06:36] : can the lemonade be sold by a giant lemon?
[06:37] themaneatingcoat: who’s cutting his wrists
[06:37] : YES!
[06:37] themaneatingcoat: things are already coming together
[06:41] : Sooooo… if I possibly made you something… vaugely valentinesy related… will you be terribly annoyed?
[06:42] themaneatingcoat: why would i be annoyed…..everything you’ve drawn or made me has been awesome.
[06:43] : la la la la la.
This was his belated Valentine’s Day present:
Stefan had wistfully told me of a doll he’d had as a teen that his father had (understandably) thrown out due to a hidden zipper compartment in the body where Stefan had hid his drugs. So taught myself to use a sewing machine and made him a new one. I used what I had; old Fox Fest t-shirts, socks, purple fishnets for hair, with a key around her neck that had a heart shaped ring.
I made sure to make body organs (out of gloves and ace bandage) with which to fill the body cavity, so there’d be no room for drugs.
I had to leave it in the hallway for him to find on his way up to my third floor bedroom. I couldn’t look at him while I gave him gifts.
February 17th
(end of IM conversation)
[09:32] themaneatingcoat: till next tim
[09:32] themaneatingcoat: e
[09:33] : …..
[09:33] themaneatingcoat: …
[09:33] : ttfn
[09:33] : oh!
[09:33] : wait!
[09:33] : Valentines pictures.
[09:33] : get thier own secion?
[09:33] : go into a HOLIDAY secion?
[09:33] : or go into the bed section?
[09:33] : and which ones?
[09:34] themaneatingcoat: that’s not a last minute thing
[09:34] themaneatingcoat: i’d have to think
[09:34] : sorry.
[09:35] : I meant to ask that earlier.
[09:35] : ummm..
[09:35] : ok.
[09:35] : nevermind.
[09:35] : instead.
[09:35] : Have yoy named the blue girl yet?
[09:36] themaneatingcoat: yeah
[09:36] themaneatingcoat: because of her hair and a half vegetable you gave me……..she is called…
[09:36] themaneatingcoat: Tina Turnip
[09:37] : HA HA HA HA HA.
[09:37] : 😀
[09:37] themaneatingcoat: ttfn
[09:37] : That’s awesome.
[09:37] : bye.
[09:37] *** “themaneatingcoat” signed off at Sun Feb 17
Date???
Stefan sends me a phone pic of the figure he’s painted on a door of his new house.
The same hair loops.
Date?
A bunch of old photos and art stuff all next to each other in my flickr feed from April 29th 2005.
date?
My childhood photos of serious face, the cartoon dolphin behind with a smiling wide eyed face
Stefan sends me a phone pic of what he’s drawing.
A little girl me as a cartoon, my father and the dolphin become a grinning fox.
May 24th
Stefan grows angry and insecure. I reassure him and it ends in sweetness and almost emotional admission.
Email from Stefan
[ excerpt ]
Mabye today there is a insecure 16 year old girl inside of me that needed to see it written………..because…….I too……….in my dark and emotionless defensive posture(my social default)….surrprised that you consider me someone that can come to your house….on a whim if I need to flee my surroundings.
I find it hard myself to except that you like me…let alone consider me anything closer. Again…..self issues.
Full exchange here.
May 25th
December 2008.
It’s hard to tell, but he’s holding up both hands. [flickr]
TENS Unit.
Electricity.
A thing with us.
May 26th
An excerpt of myspace conversation about the colors of our interactions and his aversion to his birthday.
May 27th
My Friend Stefan.
Stefan DeCarlo is a genuine friend
who is awesome as awesome can be.
he will stick by his friends
right through to the end;
be wounded and bleed willingly.
Stefan DeCarlo is my stickiest friend
who makes drawings and paintings and more.
with faux wounds down to marrow,
and syrup of karo,
we create worlds of fantastical gore.
Stefan DeCarlo is my adult-type friend
on his back; my nails, they scrape.
with flesh and skin,
we commit such sin,
they who hear are left agape.
Stefan DeCarlo is my bestest friend
he always goes far and beyond
with happy surprise,
and his long long drives,
and back and forth correspond.
Stefan DeCarlo is my favoritest friend
my favorite human on earth.
the reasons for this
are too many to list
and I wish he knew how much he’s worth
June ???
Mine posted to flickr, his to myspace.
(cropped for modesty’s sake)
July 1st
My photo from August 2005. He emulates it. [flickr]
July 23rd
email from Stefan to me
July 23rd 2008, 7:23 PM
you’re sleeping…..i cut myself shaving…..i’d like to clean but because I sorta messied your humble abode. ……but, things would be too loud.
P.S. I’m looking at the chimpanstickies you drew.
(I drew us as chimps.)
email from Stefan to me
July 24th 2008, 2:48 AM
I soooooooooo didn’t want to leave. I fooooooorced myself up and scurried, after I came out of the bathroom for the fifteenth time…..and felt that I was, finally genuinely tired……and saw you with a pleasant look on your face looking super comfy.
I was crying inside through the quick shower…… desperately wanting to drape myself over you and fall asleep with my face crammed in your tummy. I would’ve instantly fell asleep. I was….and still am, tired. ….Though,I’ve crossed the threshold of my tiredness so now I’ll obviously be awake for god knows how long. My vision is not well though.
I went out for a bit……made a few calls…..now i’m gonna be here at the kitch counter…..drawing.
Let the internet time warp begin.
August 19th – 25th
A span of emails between Stefan and I as he goes on a cross country drive.
….and I don’t even feel like going…….originally……I had the thought that <Prime Roommate> would be gone so I’d be able to enjoy your company by me, and we could get some work done……and I could have some get togethers with You, <The Brother> and a select few……now I just feel like disappearing……this sucks.
He can’t or won’t have me to his house when <Prime Roommate> is there.
On his trip, for whatever reason, he fixates intensely on my romantic/sexual past, especially in my photographs from 2001.
September 2nd-5th
I shyly tell Stefan via email he’s beautiful, he misses my skin.
September 7th
My photograph [flickr] and his of the same night. [flickr]
September 16th
A scanned in photo from the 90s becomes angels and demons.
Their color scheme of dress inspires the theme.
Her spiky jewelry inspires the pointy teeth, her watch with a shine makes the eyeballs looking upward.
September 10th
Flickr. My photograph and his [flickr], walking around Asbury.
September 20th
email from me
I…
wanted to mention.
that…
Sometimes… certain times… like last night for example…
I had some sort of difficulty in … un entangling myself from you….
bringing an end to the skin to skin
because… I felt… that I might be telling you the things I don’t say…
telling you clearly…
whispering to you through fingertips and tongue contortion
the things that words just can’t mean.
and i just didn’t want to stop telling you all those things i never said before.
email from Stefan
Like we spoke of before……..if it were ideal reality…….
……there are certain times and things that would just happen and be experienced without fatigue or end.
September 25th
Some emails between us of seriousness and compliment.
You give me something to look forward to. There’s this amazingness that comes with feeling… understood, trusted, enjoyed, appreciated… and understanding, trusting, enjoying, appreciating in turn… something that feels like being freshly showered in a comfy sweater and clean fuzzy socks while feeling the brisk wind of an autumn rainstorm blowing through the window and drinking a mug of warmth…. Only a million times better. that awesomeness of exhilerating comfiness. Of feeling RIGHT.
September 29th
Mine then his [flickr]. Uploaded the same day.
October 14th
What follows is a handful of drawings based on scanned in photos from my early 20’s, mostly 2001. My bawdy crowd of comic book professionals and fans was a notorious nerdy party scene on debaucherous display. Stefan fixated on this time in my life.
The faces combined, and hands replicated, the wooden shelving inspires the coffin and stake.
Date?
2001 bar hijinx.
Date?
2001 bar scene. I’d gone on two drunken dates with the <Comic Artist Guy> in the background, which Stefan repeatedly brought up in bewildered disgust.
His drink holding hand becomes her candle holding hand.
Date?
2001 me at a bar.
I am both the human and the monster.
Date?
2001 nerd bar scene.
The tin lunch boxes inspire the robot. The woman on the left inspires the pose and torso. The faces on the right combine for the woman.
Date?
All next to each other in my flickr stream. More bar fun.
Both images of me make the vampire, the dude is the pumpkin, the other chick is the mustached man, childhood me is faceless.
Date?
2001 bar fun and 2003 random photo.
He reuses both my hands in different places, the same angle of clothing against my chest, the V of his necklace dictates the V of the robe. The antique scale was directly above this photograph in the feed, the needle creating the chandelier, the oval designs on the scale face inspiring the mirror.
Date?
2001 life.
These zombies were all photos of me and my abusive ex-girlfriend.
Date?
2001 bar antics.
Date?
2001 outing.
The plant emerging from the top of the demon head partially obscured by spikes becomes Jesus’ Sacred Heart, his hands above the two faces. The background makes for the appearance of a leaf-like green triangle below my ear, which is turned into a pair of earing-like leaves in his drawing.
Date?
That same gloved photograph is right above this candid shoulder shot of me in that flickr album. The shoulder shot then brings him to this teenage Sears photoshoot. He is reminded of Rita Hayworth.
He changes the gloves, adds extra wrinkles to makes them like mine. He makes the dress more like the texture of my shirt. Closes her mouth, widens her nose.
This might all seem reaching, but he could copy textures and wrinkles exactly if he wanted to.
Date?
More photos from 2001-2002.
My abusive girlfriend leaving me a breakup note becomes the caged raven, me sitting next to a door is repeated, the woman in red with a framed picture on the wall behind her becomes the figure in the frame, the ornate pattern of the frame dictated by the scalloped edges of the bottom of her shirt, the white feather boa becomes a white fluffy cat, the hookah inspires both the snakey object on the floor and the base of the bird cage.
Date?
2001 life.
The pink of my lips and the tree in the background are combined and used for the rectangle of pink in his drawing. My hair barrette looks like a fish, which he turns into a fish pin on her collar. My glasses chain as inspiration for the crucifix.
Date?
2001 bar scene. The bright red of her collar reminds him of fake blood, the line of the wood paneling like rope, which reminds him of Suspiria.
He combines their faces with this scene, changes the mouth and the hair.
Date?
More 2001 bar antics.
The bearded dude in the jacket becomes the chipmunk, the people bearing teeth inspires the slug mouth, the worminess dictated by the dragon shirt, the headpiece inspired by the t-shirt graphic with cut colar and necklace, the color scheme dictated by their clothes and the lunchboxes behind them.
Date?
He titled this one “Dead Whore”.
Date?
Three old scanned photos from 2001, next to each other in flickr.
Date?
All from my photobucket; two old drawings of mine, a still from an old french 80’s cartoon, and my abusive ex-girlfriend.
The gorilla makes the beast face, the cartoon provides the mohawk, the vagina dentata inspires the teeth and linework, the headphone strap (upsidedown) becomes long fangs, and the ex is the beast rider.
Date?
Again from my photobucket, all circa 2005-2006? Old photos of war protests, a self portrait, and an old drawing is mashed together.
The sign replicated, the doves inspire the angel, my drawing makes the demon child, the woman’s hair becomes the demon’s.
Date?
Old family photo I’d scanned in while we were first hanging out in 2007.
Date?
Ocean Grove 2006.
Curtains for hair, bird wings for horns, pitcher handle for hail.
October 23rd
A polaroid amongst other items sent to me after Stefan’s death that were found in his lock box.
November 3rd
(and beyond)
Romance From Beyond, the comic book we were collaborating on.
November 5th
email from me
my kidneys…
my painful month of antibiotics for Lyme…
my swollen hive face..
spinal tap illness…
(i’m forgeting one)
random pains…
etc etc.
…. i’m forever sick.
and… you’ve been very kind and awesome. every time.
seriously awesome and amazing.
November 17th
The expressions of the masks follow the faces of my mother and I.
Date?
2005.
The bondage theme inspired by our tied bikinis. Her body, my hand, the horizon line the same slope. The vase from the fencing in the distance (turned sideways), the grasses growing behind me. The shape of the face from her bikini top, her braid for the anteater tongue.
Date?
2005. Next to each other in the Social Activity album.
Date?
Family reunion hi-jinx at Fox Fest 2005.
The pose obviously from my uncle in his Fox Fest regalia of hat, cape, and staff. The big eye from a design on my brother’s shirt, the tentacles from the ceiling lamp, the shape of the smaller eyes from an artifact from the lens and light.
Date?
2004.
Date?
2003. A fellow I was dating, and then me at the Mermaid Parade.
My ponytail replicated, the scaffolding drawn into a shape behind the monster, the pattern of his shirt drawn into the monster’s necklace, his glasses dictating the monster’s deep eye hollows, the oversized puppet makes the dragging monster hands, I am the doll of the puppet.
Date?
Scanned from 2002. Near each other in the Social Activity flickr album.
Faces combined, the carnival worker inspires the collar.
Date?
2005.
The door replicated, her spiky bangs represented by the pointy hair flower, their faces combined, the pearl necklace remains, the bench in the background becomes a shelf, the handled pot on the shelf mimicking the pose of my aunt, the vase mimicking the beer bottle.
Date?
From my Early Years flickr album.
The beams inspire the tree shape, combined with another old photo nearby in my flickr feed. The sunglasses make for wide googly eyes.
Date?
My 2008 drawing, then his.
Date?
Ocean Grove, 2007. He goes back to these photos repeatedly.
The pitcher handle mimicked by the beard curl, the ears inspired from the pitcher spout, curls of the fur from the mirror curves and mattress pattern.
Date?
Ocean Grove.
The arch of the grill handle becomes the hood, his hand replicated, the cloth wrinkles and plants remain.
Date?
Fox Fest 2006 and 2007. The children combined. First on his site, then colored for tumblr.
Date?
March 2006.
Date?
I drew a fat mermaid from pornography, he draws an equally buxom woman from a porn site.
Date?
All next to each other in my Early Years [flickr] gallery.
Opening a Ouija board on Christmas, the red of my Aunt’s top, and the terror of braces inspires the demon theme. I’m such a dork.
Date?
I’d given him a present (kept in his lock box) part of which was this drawing of the espresso machine he’d given me.
He draws a massive one on cardboard.
Date?
2007. The hand position in this photo of Stefan and I at dinner reminds him of this photo I took of the motorcycle-ex, so he combines them.
The light beam on the wall inspires the shower, the water pitcher inspires the showerhead.
Belated Christmas
A present I gave him for Christmas in the form of a handwritten story, which was also found in his lock box.
